A safeword is a pre-determined word used to slow or stop a scene. The most commonly used safewords are yellow (“slow down, I’m nearing my limit”) and red (“stop right now, something is very wrong”).
Occasionally, safewords are used outside of what most would consider a scene. In a relationship dynamic where a bottom has given up control to a Top (often called power exchange or authority exchange), one or the other still might safeword to indicate that they have an issue with some non-physical element of the relationship or with an ongoing physical task (such as long-term orgasm denial).
Although this fact is often overlooked, Tops may call a safeword as well as bottoms.
Please note that a safeword is not a guarantee of safety. Simply calling a safeword with someone who intends to violate your consent won’t stop anything. And even when intentions on both sides are good, sometimes a safeword can be called too late, and damage has already been done.
Because the nature of S&M play is inherently risky, this is a point that cannot be emphasized enough. There is no way to guarantee safety. PRICK and RACK are important principles here for anyone who wishes to engage in S&M play.
Important note: There is no such thing as a universally-accepted definition of anything in the world of kink. These definitions are mermaidmickey’s only. Feel free to add your own thoughts in the comments!
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